People often ask my siblings and I what it was like to grow up with Wayne Dyer as a dad. I usually immediately feel this need to bring up my mom- since she did so much of the “raising” and has probably been the greatest spiritual influence on my dad throughout his life. The funny thing about that is my parents separated over 12 years ago- but they have remained incredibly close, so close that they have never gotten a divorce- they said they never felt the need to.
Growing up with spiritual parents has taught me that receiving all the love and wisdom in the world is a beautiful thing, but it won’t help you, until you learn to love and treasure every part of yourself.
This self-understanding was a long time coming—I have struggled with my biggest fear, which has always been living someone else’s dharma, life, or dream while being too afraid to go after my own. I don’t proclaim to be an expert or guru; I would like to share my life with anyone who is interested so that hopefully you will feel comfortable sharing your authentic self with others as well.
Co-authored with my dad, Dr. Wayne Dyer, I have written a book about growing up in a spiritual environment and what I have learned about self-worth and following my dharma.
My main passion is connecting and sharing with others in a meaningful way to promote conversation and maintain authentic self-expression. I like sharing a real and vulnerable side of myself while working to encourage others to accept that side of themselves as well. I also enjoy cooking, reading, entertaining and having dinner parties. I live in South Florida with my fiancé. Our favorite hobby is traveling together. My non-profit, Stop Child Trafficking, is working to eradicate child trafficking through education and advocacy.
Growing up, one of my parent’s had a bumper sticker on their car that said, “practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty” along with another bumper sticker that said, “I am a proud parent unconditionally.” I have heard people talk about “random acts of kindness” but I never knew the power such a little event could have on someone.
In July, my mom and I were on Maui doing wedding planning things for my upcoming wedding which will take place there. We decided to stop at a little restaurant called Leoda’s for lunch and while we were eating there, my mom noticed a little girl, about 4 years old, wearing a cast on her arm and looking kind of down. My mom gave birth to 7 children naturally and has dedicated her life to raising all of us in the most natural, loving, and kind environment that she and my Dad could dream up. Needless to say, my mom is very tuned into children and very sensitive to their feelings.
When we finished lunch and were heading out, my mom stopped at the table where the little girl was eating lunch with her mom and sister and pulled out a $5.00 bill to give to the girl. My mom said to her, “I had a broken arm and remember what that was like so I would like to give you $5.00 to get some candy or something special since I know it isn’t easy to go through all of this.” The little girl was giddy with excitement and her mother shook my mom’s hand and said “thank you so much, this is really kind of you… look how happy she is!”
We left Leoda’s and got in the car and I remember thinking how weird that was to give someone else’s child money and how some people might not like that but I also was really touched by it because clearly the mom was OK with it. Not to mention the little girl was so happy to be singled out and given something special! I remember thinking that I would never have thought to give a child with a cast a special gift because I have never had a cast and don’t really know what that would be like, but it was normal to see my mom do something special for a child or someone who seemed down because she always does things like that- it is just the way she is!
Anyway, last week I found a furniture rental company that I was interested in using for some rentals I needed for my wedding so I sent the owner of the company an email and asked if she could send me the price list for the items I was interested in. The woman, Melissa, wrote back and said that she had even more items for rent on her facebook page so I should check that out and see if there is anything else I like that I would be interested in renting as well.
I went on her facebook page, found a TON of things I loved that were reasonably priced, and sent her a message saying I would love to work with her for my wedding. She wrote me back and said that after my message, she looked me up on facebook and couldn’t believe it. She asked me if I had been in Leoda’s in July when a woman I was with gave a little girl with a cast $5.00. I replied to her that yes, I was there and that woman was my mother. Melissa then wrote back to tell me that my mom gave that money to her daughter, who is 3 and a half, who has been sick for a while and has had medical complications throughout her young life, but that she has never forgotten that “random act of kindness” that my mom did for her daughter and that her little girl hasn’t forgotten it either! She said that they immediately went next door to get a shave ice and her daughter proudly handed over her $5.00 bill to pay for her special treat. Melissa also said that her little girl regularly asks now when they can go back to Leoda’s to find her “special Auntie!”
I couldn’t wait to read my mom the message from Melissa and let her know that this mother was so touched by her kindness and hasn’t forgotten what happened that day- and that this woman is now going to be involved in helping me create the wedding of my dreams! My mom’s response- in her typical fashion- was to ask me to get Melissa’s address so she could send her little girl a surprise box of goodies from her “special Auntie from Leoda’s!”
I really understand the bumper sticker now. Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty. Thanks mom.
Yesterday I can lunch with my mom Marcelene, my younger sister Saje and two other women, Somy and Ericka. Somy contacted me through a mutual friend regarding an organization she founded called No More Tears. Ericka is an attorney who helps Somy with legal cases regarding the women that Somy serves. When we walked into the restaurant to meet these women yesterday I was immediately struck with how physically beautiful both of them are. These women are stunning! Somy is a former Bollywood start who moved back to the US to be closer to family and ended up using her Bollywood savings to educate herself in both college and grad school and then found her organization, No More Tears.
I have been involved with No More Tears (NMT) for 2 days now and I can tell you that this organization and the work they are doing has brought me a lot of tears. A ton actually. Over the last 48 hours I have quietly wept to myself on numerous occasions for a multitude of reasons. To begin with- I have tears of awe. I received an email from Somy regarding a woman that was living in a shelter a few miles from my home after having escaped an abusive husband who trafficked her into the United States and then kept her in his home with his wife and two teenage children, forcing her to basically be his sex slave and maid. During that time, this woman gave birth to one son, who is now 3 and a half and suffered through numerous miscarriages because the man literally beat the baby out of her. In one instance, he beat her so badly that the 3 month fetus inside of her died, but he refused to get her medical care until she was in her 7th month, and it was only after she was in so much agony that she couldn’t stop screaming that he drove her to a hospital to have the fetus removed. Imagine carrying a deceased fetus in your womb for 4 months. Just imagine.
The truth for me- is that I can’t imagine. No one has ever beat me, abused me or raped me. I can’t imagine what it is like to suffer at the hands of someone else because I have never done so. At least not in this lifetime. I also can’t imagine what it is like to be raped over and over again and then beat over and over again by the father of my child- and I can’t imagine what her little boy has seen or felt or heard either.
But because this is a story of triumph over tragedy, I would like to move on. So, a few days ago Somy emailed me about her organization and also about this woman- who escaped this man after discovering she was pregnant again, and fled to a shelter. The shelter contacted Somy because they knew that she has an organization that helps women who have been trafficked and abused, and Somy reached out to me- asking if I could help No More Tears but more importantly, if I could help this woman.
Somy was waining to hear if the woman was approved for the studio apartment she was hoping to move her in to and in the mean time, I emailed my family asking how they could help.
Here is where the tears come in. In 24 hours, I was able to secure for this woman a double stroller, car seat, grocery store gift cards, towels, sheets, kitchen items, toys for her son, a scooter, DVD’s, dishes, a blender, and some baby outfits for her soon to be born daughter. All in 24 hours. Then, when we met them for lunch yesterday- I was able to offer to pay for one month of her rent and sure enough- my 23 year old sister opened her check book and paid for another month’s rent and then my mom did the same. I spoke with my dad later that day and we offered to cover her rent for a year. The outpouring of generosity from my family is so touching to me. We all believe in the idea that if you want to be wealthy in life, be generous, and seeing my family be as generous as they can be just makes me cry!
The other tears came today when I went to the studio apartment to help move this woman and her son in. I came with a car full of belongings and this woman was so grateful that she gave me her jewelry box as a symbol of her gratefulness. This is a woman that has nothing. She doesn’t speak English and her family is thousands of miles away in Morocco. She was trafficked here as a mail-order-bride and has been abused for years. And yet- despite all of it- grace still resides inside of her. She is not bitter- she must have said a hundred times today “happy happy” and “thank you.” I had to fight back tears when I was helping to unpack her bathroom as I felt so grateful to be there and serve her. It is in giving that we receive- and today- I received more than my share of grace. I have been so blessed in this lifetime and being able to share and give to someone else makes me feel so happy- I feel like she is the one giving me everything…
I believe that when we operate from a space that says: how may I serve? The universe operates back by saying: how may I serve you? This isn’t why we give and serve others- but it is always the outcome. I haven’t felt as energized and full as I feel today- in a long time.
I am now going to work with empowering this woman and being of service to as many survivors as I can through the No More Tears organization. As a woman, I feel it is my job to help other women. I am so grateful to be able to do so. Thank you, thank you, thank you.